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| St. Benedict Joseph Labre. My oldest daughter graciously helped me get this picture from Amy Welborn's blog. |
In honor of today's feast, I'd like to
share the story of this obscure saint, and how he profoundly touched
my life.
After trying to find his vocation at a
few monasteries, St. Benedict became a wandering pilgrim, traveling
to various churches throughout Europe, praying, giving all to God.
This, of course, meant he was homeless, destitute (if someone offered
him alms, even a penny more than what he needed, he quickly gave it
away), and yes, dirty.
I read that his confessor sometimes met
him in a different location, so he didn't bring vermin into the
Church. I've also read that his stench, and other unappealing
aspects of Benedict Joseph's life appealed to him, in part, because
they served as deterrents to people otherwise drawn to his holiness.
He didn't want his life to be about him. He wanted it to be about
God. His life truly was a meditation on the part of Jesus' life that
made Him “a worm, and no
man; scorned by men, and despised by the people” (Psalm
22:6).
When Benedict Joseph died, however, the
cry went up almost instantly that he was a saint. People rich and
poor came in great numbers to see his body before he was laid to
rest. His family, who had not heard from their son in over a decade,
learned of his death as the word spread throughout Europe that a
saint had died.
Benedict's story definitely is unique;
but as I first read it, I wondered what in the world it had to do
with me. I had drawn his name as my Companion Saint for 2010. This
is a tradition shared with my family by one of my son's Godmothers.
She visits our home with a tin filled with slips of paper with
saints' names, a short Bible verse, and prayer intentions. We say a
short prayer asking the Holy Spirit to guide our choice, draw a slip
of paper, and “meet” a saint who can walk with us in a special
way through the new year. According to tradition, my friend says,
the saint really chooses you!
If nothing else, this is a great
way to learn about new saints – that “great cloud of witnesses”
that has gone before us (Heb 12:1-3). However, more often than not,
the saint a person chooses seem to speak to some prayer on their
heart. That certainly had been the case for me in the past. And as
I drew St. Benedict Joseph Labre's name in January 2010, with many
questions weighing heavily on my heart, I hoped it would be
the case again. I had been praying for guidance; for the Lord to
speak to me in some way. Would He speak to me through this saint?
As I read article after article that
night, all I could think was, “No.” This certainly seemed like a
nice saint, but the only possible connection I saw between his life
and mine was that we both had run into a string of failures – him,
with constantly being rejected by monasteries, and me, with a recent
early miscarriage and some other endeavors I had undertaken.
While I trusted there could be more at
work than I understood at the time, that year's Companion Saint
drawing certainly seemed like a flop.
I didn't think about St. Benedict
Joseph Labre again until the next year. I had lost another baby,
this time at 21 weeks gestation. We named our son Benedict Pio. Pio
was for St. Padre Pio, on whose feast day our family was once given a
very great gift from God. And Benedict? Well, I liked the name, and
as I prayed about it in the hospital, it seemed like the right fit.
St. Benedict Jospeph Labre never occurred to me; I simply thought to
myself that there were a lot of St. Benedicts, and we could choose
one to go with our baby's name at a later date!
I hope you can stay with me through the
following explanation of how I was reminded of St. Benedict Joseph.
I truly think God was at work in it! Shortly after losing our baby,
there was a lot of discussion in the media about Tiger Mothers. Amy
Chua had written an article about Chinese mothers, and how their
aggressive parenting style demanded the best of their children.
One day, while reading Amy Welborn's
blog, I came across her very simple refutation of the Tiger Mom
theory:
“So yeah, I am humbly grateful
(very grateful!) for driven high achievers who
help make the world run better and life go more smoothly for all of
us, but the bottom line underscoring it all and framing a whole
other, very different set of priorities in childrearing and just
living, period, is that this homeless loser (Benedict Joseph Labre)
is a saint.”
My heart stopped,
and suddenly so many pieces of this puzzle God must have been working
on for so long clicked into place.
Yes, Saint
Benedict Joseph Labre, that name I had drawn just one year earlier,
had been meant for me. Weren't my unborn, miscarried children also
worthless in the sight of the world? And yet, here was God,
reminding me of how priceless they are in His sight.
St. Benedict
Joseph, in caring nothing for the next day's needs, in thinking only
of today, and of His Lord, and in giving away even the little extra he had, was so simple, so childlike, and so very,
very small.
Yet, in God's eyes,
he also is so very, very great. Priceless, in fact.
Just like my
Benedict Pio.
And this smallness,
this simplicity, this childlike-ness: these are all traits in which I
hope to grow, as a result of having had Benedict Pio. If the only
way my child can change the world is through me – this is how I
want to be different. All those heavy questions weighing on my heart
when I first drew St. Benedict's name, over three years ago? They
have resolved, not because I dealt with them with a heavy, weighty heart, but because of the times I kept my heart still and small,
and waited in faith for the Lord's timing.
Thank you, St.
Benedict Joseph Labre!
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